I have been quiet for a few days. Well, there's been a lot going on. We had a social life (or what approximates a social life for us) this weekend. And then, on Monday, I had a tummy bug. Felt dreadful.
Until lunchtime when all thoughts of my sick stomach were rudely driven from me by a phone call from my 7yo son's school.
He's got a bell stuck in his ear.
Excuse me? A what?
A bell. A tiny bell from a jester pencil topper, which rings beautifully and is no more than 5 mm in diameter. In his ear. Stuck.
They can't get it out. Can we take him to a doctor?
I sat in the car and looked at the lunch I went out to buy that was the only thing I felt I would be able to hold down. Then I rang e_w_h
and asked him to do it. Yes, I completely wimped out and decided I couldn't handle it today. I have a wonderful husband who listened to the tone of near-nervous breakdown in my voice and agreed to go.
So, I rang our GP to see if they could see him. Surgery was full but the secretary said she would fit him in. I also rang the local hospital to see if they would be able to take him as I didn't want them to have to cross the city to the children's hospital. Yes, they said, we could bring him there. It's funny though. When you tell someone your son has a bell stuck in his ear, no matter how hard they try, and how professional they attempt to be, they cannot avoid the giggle buried in their voice. "Of course *snort*, yes, bring him him *snigger*"
The GP couldn't get it out so rang the local hospital who then said they didn't have the equipment from the sound of it, (I know - its just begging for jokes. Bear with me.) so he ended up on the way to the children's hospital afterall where apparently they were brilliant. The nurse held his head, e_w_h
held his legs, an ambulance man held the light and the doctor wielded the forceps.
All was well. He came home. I asked "Why?" I mean WHY
do you put a bell in your ear?
"I wanted to see how far it would fall."
*jawclunksonfloor* Oh.. em... okay... good move LogicBoy!
This is where things get surreal. Or rather, where things grow surreal with the telling.
He went back to school yesterday. About 11am I got a phone call from his best friend's mum. The friend came home the previous night to tell a story of how there was a struggle over the pencil and one of the bells flew
off, and lodged itself so deeply in my son's ear that he had to be rushed to hospital where he was going to have to have brain
surgery to have it removed and would be deaf and have to wear one of those thingies behind his ear forever
In fairness, she did assume it wasn't quite
that serious but wanted to check he was okay.
I went to pick him up at school yesterday whereupon several small children surrounded me, asking if it was true that THREE
people had to hold him down while the doctor removed the bell?WITH SCISSORS!
*sigh* I think I need a rest just retelling it...